Stuck in the Snow With Nowhere To Go
Monday, December 2, 2013
Hey Will,
Well, true to the weatherman’s forecast last night I woke this morning to a blustery, heavy snowfall… what he’d referred to as an imminent blizzard and what you’d refer to as “one of the best days ever!” I am grateful that I don’t work Mondays and that I didn’t have to get out of bed to an alarm this morning and make my way to school. I lay in my bed for a while with the warm, feathery duvet tucked in all around me wondering if this is what it would feel like to be floating on a cloud? Outside, the snow swirled in the intermittent wind, big flakes interrupted from their usual flight pattern and what we normally see here in Redwood. Because we are nestled amongst the trees we usually see the snowflakes fall like on a Christmas card, but NOT today. For a few minutes I thought about how horrible the road conditions must be, how terrible the visibility would be on the highways, how the wind would bite my cheeks when I would eventually have to go outside to shovel the driveway… and then in the next breath I thought about what you’d be thinking if you were here. How you’d jump out of bed on this scheduled day off of school (probably before the alarm on a school day). How you’d be planning how quickly you could get dressed, eat breakfast and find a friend or two to come over and start the process of building a ski jump and mini rail park in the backyard. I chuckled to myself, thinking how brilliant Dad and I would have been in winters past to have encouraged you and your brothers to build your winter playground in the front yard (instead of the backyard) adjacent to the driveway…. how you guys would have shoveled the driveway so you’d have more snow to build with (without even thinking of it as shoveling the driveway which would have been a win/win for all of us). You wouldn’t feel the wind, or the biting cold but instead would be vibrating with excitement thinking only about being outside in the snow. Hours would pass before you’d burst through the back door shedding all of your outside winter clothing (boots and all) into a big heap hoping that I’d already thought about plugging in the kettle to make hot chocolate. I smile now remembering how rosy your cheeks would be, how your hair would look like it was home to a pack of mice after you removed your toque, how you’d say your hands and feet were frozen but not complain. I know I’d be shaking my head, wondering how kids just don’t feel the cold like grown-ups. And then, here it comes, Will… the words that would roll off my tongue, “Will, please hang up your coat, put your mitts on the heat register. Your toque won’t dry laying under your boots (oh, there’d probably be more) and then you can have a cup of hot chocolate.” Because you’d really only come inside for a cup of hot chocolate and a chance to warm up your fingers and toes you’d comply without me having to ask you again to clean up the “heap” at the back door. As soon as your belly was warm, and your fingers and toes too, out you’d go and the process would begin again. Outside, inside, outside, inside…
Tonight when I’d tuck you into your bed, you’d be hoping and praying for the heavy snowfall to continue. The icing on the cake would be a phone call from Rockyview Schools early tomorrow morning saying that school was cancelled due to the weather so you could repeat today; a true blue snow day and no school was the very best kind.
So instead of thinking of today as a terrible winter blizzard, I am going to think of it as you’d have. I’ve nowhere that I have to be today, so I’m happy to be “stuck here” at home. Each time I look out the window, Will, I will imagine you out there in all your glory… loving every minute of the heavy snowfall and all the winter playground possibilities that it would bring. This afternoon, I’ll plug in the kettle and make some hot chocolate; I’ll make two cups, Will… one for you with extra marshmallows and one for me. I’ll give yours to Dad since he’s working from home today and we’ll smile through our tears wishing you were here.
Missing you so much today. Love you like a yellow school bus stuck in the snow with nowhere to go.
Momxo
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August 23, 2016
Hey Willy,
Yesterday was a 2-2 day. Another mark on the “when our world was perfect” scale and like all the days that mark the 22nd day of each month this day just always gets me. The 2-2 days seem to be a little more difficult than all the other days. I’m certain that even without a calendar my body has come to know when it is the dawn of a 2-2 day because as soon as I wake the rhythm of that day changes. It stops. I stop. I spend much of that day preoccupied with thoughts of you. I time travel back to the days and years when our world was perfect because you were in it. We didn’t know it then but we sure know it now.
you bring back so many memories with such clarity…and for a moment I could smell that sweet outside smell that accompanied those red rosy apple cheeks…loving you and your memories
Thank you, Kristin. I am really missing you. Such a difficult time of year… as you know. So glad you are in my world. Xo
Hi Joni, Such a beautiful letter I love reading them even though I cry every time you are such a beautiful writer and I felt as though I was in Redwood with you smelling the crisp air and enjoying the beauty. I know Will lives your letters. Love Lyn. X.
Thank you, Lyn. As always, your love and encouragement of my writing means the world to me. You are gold. Xo